Can I be real for a minute? Am I the only one that ever just gets it wrong sometimes? Am I the only one who when you step away from a situation, realizes just how bad you messed up?
Do you ever put your foot in your mouth and then make room to squeeze the other one in there with it? Am I the only one who tries to bring peace to a situation only to end up with the realization that you only made it more chaotic?
Have you ever made the statement that you aren’t controlling, yet all the while trying to “manage” the circumstances?
Still being real…. if I am honest with myself, I do it more often than I like, more often than I admit. This realization causes me to not be very happy with myself. Now I know that this sounds like a pity party, and it may have started out that way, but with the help of God and some hard work, it will not finish that way!
It’s like getting to that place in the road where it has been flooded and water covers the entire road. You can’t tell how deep the water is. You can’t see the bottom. You don’t know if the water is shallow or if it is completely washed out underneath. The water is dark, but in your mind, you think that you know what is right and you just need to get to the other side. The sign says CAUTION, Water covering the road. But you ignore the signs.
You drive through the water, you push through, and sometimes everything is ok. Sometimes, the water wasn’t that deep and you make it to the other side, and all is well. But occasionally, that water was deeper than expected or washed out underneath, and you find yourself stuck or swept away. That desire to push through got you in even more trouble and you are now in a disaster.
That’s me! Sad, but true…is that you sometimes, too? Trying to hurry, or trying to make a situation better, I push through and push aside that still, small voice that says don’t go there. Don’t say it. Keep quiet and stay out of it. Instead, I know better and I push through. I can manage the situation. I can fix it.
End result? Disaster…and a situation that is worse than how it began. I’ve been swept away by the water.
So what am I doing with my new found realization? I’m making a better effort to pay attention to the signs. I’m trying to listen better to the still, small voice. My own voice tends to drown it out quite often. I’m learning that if I stop talking, I hear it much better.
Proverbs 25:11-13 ESV
I’m learning that the signs are there for a reason. They are there to protect us. That little voice inside my head, inside my very soul, that is saying “Be quiet,” isn’t getting ignored as much. I’m learning to forgive myself. I’m attempting to ask forgiveness from others. I’m spending time in The Father’s House and getting some much needed wisdom and grace.
*I do not own the rights to this music*
Hopefully my transparency is helpful. My Pastor always says, “People need to see our scars.” So I’m showing mine. They aren’t healed over, in fact they are still pretty fresh. These wounds may even get opened again a few times, but I’m okay with that. I know where to go to get them bandaged and where to get the healing my soul needs.
I’m learning to be weak. I don’t have to have all of the answers. I don’t have to fix all of the problems and I don’t have to make everyone happy. All I have to do is be weak. He will be strong. And when I let Him be Him, He steps in with the answers and brings peace that only he can give.
So true Heather
My mother always told us that God gave us one mouth but more importantly He gave us two ears to listen to what others are saying before we start speaking
May God continue to bless you with such wonderful insight in our everyday lives!
Thanks for sharing your mother’s wisdom. Wise words for us to live by! Thank you as well for reading and your kind words. I appreciate your encouragement!